Big Sean ft Chris Brown – My Last

Let’s see, I was speaking to my mum who told me something as we were talking about personas. Hers is one that is very much forward so people can see how she is and so they change themselves to reflect this.

My mum then told me I hide me, inside me and so no one knows. However with society being the way they assume you are a doormat and thus treat you in this same fashion. And then I get angry and people are surprised at what I may/may not do.

I know I do ponder at what happened to me over the years, as I can still see me in my kiddie videos where I’m a loud mouth and loved being centre of stage, to me now, who behind the scenes is still a bit whacky but I prefer not being in the limelight.

Apparently I am also diplomatic in the way that I mange not to answer a direct question, but straight talking too. It’s bizarre I guess seeing as I’ve never looked at myself personally but try and see myself through other’s eyes. However another person is just a reflection of me within them and then seeing me, which can mean I am just putting me in the light I wish to be.

Am I too old to still be in this stage of self discovery, I really need to be by myself, I know I have yet to develop mentally which is really holding me back, as my distrust in people is so high.